21 March
Rainy day
Rainy day
Dear blog,
I have to admit that week was one of the worst week of my life. Too many things were happening, too many feelings. There were so many, so many things I want to say out but I feel extremely tired when I even start to think bout it. And even basketball, the one thing that keeps my mind off stuffs didn't work. I don't even feel happy anymore when I play. The last time I played, my performance was way below standard. And for the past 3 weeks almost everyone in the team had been busy so there were no practices at all. All these really sucks.
But let's forget about that week. Let's talk about the week before that.
Thursday night, the night before my last paper and all the partying that's going to happen the next day, I received a call. A phone call that I managed to finally tell the person at the other side of the phone of a decision that has been decided for so long. And that the decision was, I'm taking a break from Primers. A indefinite break.
Which brings me to a point that I recently realised and felt. Time passes so fast, that its been a year already. A year ago at this time, Kay and I were called up to help plan for POC. Something that both of us still couldn't believe, that when we joined POC in year1 we still told each other we might be GLs or AGLs the next year. But a year later we were assistant camp commander and assistant program head. We were starting to embark on a journey which I guess had affected us to a certain extent. And then the series of events planning and all the stuff that happened which brought us to where we are now.
I though I was doing well. Being absent from Primers for a few months and just spending time I didn't had much in the past with my other friends. Be it catching up with old friends or spending quality time together with my classmates. But when I saw the photos, the videos of the events I missed and how much fun they had, I realised that was the reason why I was willing to sacrifice my time on the stuff they did. The fun, the enjoyment and the people. I know I shouldn't be saying this but, it kinda sucks not being part of the fun they were in. But I know that I'll definitely go back someday, which ironically might be anytime soon.
And other then being the up and coming freshies for Primers, there was also FOC, FOP. Something that sadly can only happen once in the three years of poly. But I guess what was the best thing other then the unforgettable experience I had was that I got to know quite many new people. And that some of these people now, are friends that really matter to me.
But let's not talk about unhappy stuffs. Let's talk about a happy stuff.
Just last week, I finally managed to get the phone I've been waiting so long for, the black Nokia 5800. I have to say, I have never been so hyped up about anything like this before. Anyways so I had to change from my old phone to the new one. And as a person who holds alot to each tiny thing (someone once said this to me), I went through all the past messages over again.
I read through all the messages in the inbox and the sent messages inbox and it brings back alot to me. I still remember the incidents behind each message, and the feelings at that point of time. It really sucks when you know what might have been the best time in your life had passed and that it can never happen again.
Alright, I guess that's about it for this entry. Sorry if I had been writing too many unhappy stuffs here and being kinda emotional. But like I said before, I guess this's the only place I say out the stuffs that's happening and how I feel. But I believe the next time I write, things will be better.
Ben.
I have to admit that week was one of the worst week of my life. Too many things were happening, too many feelings. There were so many, so many things I want to say out but I feel extremely tired when I even start to think bout it. And even basketball, the one thing that keeps my mind off stuffs didn't work. I don't even feel happy anymore when I play. The last time I played, my performance was way below standard. And for the past 3 weeks almost everyone in the team had been busy so there were no practices at all. All these really sucks.
But let's forget about that week. Let's talk about the week before that.
Thursday night, the night before my last paper and all the partying that's going to happen the next day, I received a call. A phone call that I managed to finally tell the person at the other side of the phone of a decision that has been decided for so long. And that the decision was, I'm taking a break from Primers. A indefinite break.
Which brings me to a point that I recently realised and felt. Time passes so fast, that its been a year already. A year ago at this time, Kay and I were called up to help plan for POC. Something that both of us still couldn't believe, that when we joined POC in year1 we still told each other we might be GLs or AGLs the next year. But a year later we were assistant camp commander and assistant program head. We were starting to embark on a journey which I guess had affected us to a certain extent. And then the series of events planning and all the stuff that happened which brought us to where we are now.
I though I was doing well. Being absent from Primers for a few months and just spending time I didn't had much in the past with my other friends. Be it catching up with old friends or spending quality time together with my classmates. But when I saw the photos, the videos of the events I missed and how much fun they had, I realised that was the reason why I was willing to sacrifice my time on the stuff they did. The fun, the enjoyment and the people. I know I shouldn't be saying this but, it kinda sucks not being part of the fun they were in. But I know that I'll definitely go back someday, which ironically might be anytime soon.
And other then being the up and coming freshies for Primers, there was also FOC, FOP. Something that sadly can only happen once in the three years of poly. But I guess what was the best thing other then the unforgettable experience I had was that I got to know quite many new people. And that some of these people now, are friends that really matter to me.
But let's not talk about unhappy stuffs. Let's talk about a happy stuff.
Just last week, I finally managed to get the phone I've been waiting so long for, the black Nokia 5800. I have to say, I have never been so hyped up about anything like this before. Anyways so I had to change from my old phone to the new one. And as a person who holds alot to each tiny thing (someone once said this to me), I went through all the past messages over again.
I read through all the messages in the inbox and the sent messages inbox and it brings back alot to me. I still remember the incidents behind each message, and the feelings at that point of time. It really sucks when you know what might have been the best time in your life had passed and that it can never happen again.
Alright, I guess that's about it for this entry. Sorry if I had been writing too many unhappy stuffs here and being kinda emotional. But like I said before, I guess this's the only place I say out the stuffs that's happening and how I feel. But I believe the next time I write, things will be better.
Ben.